The pain...

2 min read

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Being an empath... even partially,is a bitch sometimes. One of my roommates got some terrible news a mere 30 minutes into his shift - A dear friend of his, one who was beyond close to his heart, was killed in a car wreck. He managed to make it through his shift, and about three hours after he got home he finally broke. Being a partial empath, I can sometimes feel exactly what someone else is feeling, if its strong enough - or if I personally have experienced that feeling myself.

This situation falls into both, sadly. Sixteen years ago, roughly, I lost my girlfriend when her family's car was hit by a train. I'd somehow gotten to the wreck site before the ambulance, and had the soul-crushing, crippling experience of having her die in my arms. To this day I still have moments where I see my hands once more soaked with her blood.

That experience those many years past is how I can say I know the pain my roommate feels. Add in the sheer force of his feelings, and you've got my current situation... at the time of writing this, my own heart has been in physical pain for an hour, and I know it ain't stopping anytime soon. All I can do is simply be here and act as I always have in times like this - the understanding, mostly-quiet should upon which to cry one's heart out.

To all of you out there who know the pain of loss via death, you know what I mean when I say that his pain will never end, and may in fact never even lessen that much given his closeness to this friend of his. You'll also - hopefully - understand when I say the fires of the pain of loss will forge us all anew. Remember this, all of you reading now...

I may never be physically there during your own hard times, but my soul shall always weep with you, seek to comfort you, and look forward to the days when you can once more show the world just how brightly you shine.
© 2015 - 2024 shisarakage
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